


Of Creepy Pastas, Chemistry, and New Clothes

by Lynn_Loch



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Established Relationship, Good Albus Dumbledore, Good Severus Snape, M/M, Mentioned Albus Dumbledore, Rare Pairings, Romance, Severus Snape Lives
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-21
Updated: 2020-08-21
Packaged: 2021-03-06 15:48:50
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,002
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26031427
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lynn_Loch/pseuds/Lynn_Loch
Summary: Severus Snape and Gilderoy Lockhart are YouTubers and people love to speculate about what goes on between the two.Fic-lit! Very short!
Relationships: Gilderoy Lockhart/Severus Snape
Comments: 4
Kudos: 27





	Of Creepy Pastas, Chemistry, and New Clothes

**Author's Note:**

> I do not know much about chemicals and compounds none about the work feilds that specializes in them, I am so sorry.

His videos were always slow to load but made up for it with their quality and so were always worth it. As the video finally played a deep voice began to read,"Father O’Brian- You’ve asked me to keep a journal, and here it is. It seems that relocating to Maryland was a waste…" 

Severus Snape continued to read, a recent creepypasta called  _ He Comes Closer When I Blink  _ written by  _ P.F. McGrail _ , and his voice got a darker tilt to it the further along he read. His voice drifted smoothly into a practice hoarseness to add to the atmosphere of the story, as if someone reading the journal entries had been reading them for far too long or maybe had been there when they happened and couldn't bear to continue but did anyways. 

This skill in changing his already deep voice is one reason his channel, ThePrincesTales, became so successful in the first place. The other being what he is renowned for in the first place.

In the fields of experimental chemistry, no name brings as much attention as Severus Snape. He was a game changer for medical researchers, an inspiration to geneticists, and his research, twenty years after he was forced to leave his work due to personal injury, is taught in advanced college classes around the world. 

He used to give seminars for a prestigious private STEM school in Scotland, Hogwarts University. Now, the only place you can hear his lectures is through his Twitch streams or through their recordings posted an hour after to his YouTube channel. 

His channel is an odd mix to be sure, but extremely popular because of it. And his frequent visitor (or as he would call him, interruption) would only help to boost said popularity: Gilderoy Lockhart.

Gilderoy Lockhart, in the most recent years of his career, has earned the title of redeemed con artist. When he was younger he went from city to city promising hollow promises and getting more money than he would ever need for it. Despite being deplorable, none of what he did could be considered illegal as the law was one of the few things that he was good at. He could have become a lawyer with how good he was with laws and regulations and how to get around them in 3 easy steps, but he had delusions of grandeur and much preferred using his tricks for himself rather than for other people. 

Over the years, however, he pissed off many people and eventually had to quit his "day job" as it were. Now, here he was. One of the top creators on YouTube. One would think that based off his past not many people would be willing to listen to him ramble on about clothes, make up, and whatever new thing he got in the mail that week but surprisingly, or rather unsurprisingly, he is good enough with people and charming enough to have been the first person in England to have up wards of three quarters of a billion subscribers.

Even  _ with _ his past being public.

Gilderoy and Severus, despite having very different personalities and very different subject matter for their videos and streams, would frequently post videos with the other being, in some way, involved. When Severus would post longer creepypasta's, often with many character. he would have both himself and Gilderoy voice act these character's voices and emotions and over the years they have gotten scarily good at it. Gilderoy however would find just about any way he could to rope Severus into something or other for his videos.

Once he got Severus to dress up in full medieval robes, he proceeded to call himself a potions master for the rest of the video. Another time Gilderoy got him to try drag makeup, which he seemed both upset by and happy for. He was very attractive. Only once however was Gilderoy able to get him to wear a color that wasn't black or dark enough to be mistaken for black. The video was only up for an hour.

Today, however, was Thursday. That ment, in about an hour at 5pm, Gilderoy Lockhart would be starting his stream on his twitch channel Magical Me. Many of both his and Severus' fans, who knew that Severus might show up in the stream or interrupt it with something interesting, were killing time waiting for it by watching both of their most recent YouTube videos. This would mean a recent creepypasta for some and a makeup tutorial that drifted into dadist nonsense and obscure references for others.

Which meant re-watching videos from many of the die hard fans and for new fans it was primarily catch up, but when it hit five or seemed like everyone was in for a treat. 

Gilderoy had found a new makeup brand.

Better yet, one he hated. 

For the next hour and a half Gilderoy went off about the company's business practices, how they treated their workers ("Even when my main income was taking advantage of people, in the horrible situation I was in, even  _ I  _ was better to people," he seathed, wildly gesturing around himself "I mean, would giving them a little health care and safety tools kill them!?"). Finally he got to the what he considered their most heinous crime: despite all the bad things that had done even by his standards, they couldn't even produce any sense of quality. 

"They charge, for this eyeshadow pallette, The Madam Secretary, alone, the same price as like the Natasha Pallette from Sephora and it's drugstore quality. And I mean bottom of a one pound bin kind of quality. It is so cheap-"

Severus took his moment to finally interrupt, " They use asbestos in their eyeshadow, which is cheap but can cause Cancer in several parts of the body depending on exposure, frequency of exposure, and how long it takes for the person to seek out treatment." He came over from off screen and sat next to Gilderoy "Because the pallette is so cheap and powdery, the asbestos could also be inhaled with could lead to several issues such as Cancer, as mentioned before, and additional scaring of the lungs, Pleural disease with can cause changes in the membrane surrounding the lungs and the chest cavity. 

"This company is cutting many corners to lower the personal cost of their makeup while simultaneously overcharging their customers. Its almost like the company was left in the hands of self righteous dunderheads and pompous pricks who are dumb enough not to care about the backlash their products will bring," he concluded.

"Yes I was just about to get to that, Love"

And the chat went wild. Half the viewers were from America and would swear up and down that this was the last nail in the coffin, these two had to be dating! The other half was from England or at the very least had an understanding of how people from England spoke and tried to assure their counterparts that it couldn't possibly mean that. They were close, yes, but they couldn't possibly be dating. 

Even after the stream had ended, fans from all over were speculating on the nature of Severus' and Gilderoys relationship. Eventually they were split into three groups. 

The quote un-qote "Light side" which were adamant that those two were together. They drew art, wrote fics, and tried searching, with the same level of creepy as a stalker, through all of Severus' and Gilderoys videos looking for proof of their relationship.

The self proclaimed Dark side established themselves quickly after. They were insistent that these two were nothing more than close friends. They could be seen frequently using the arguments that "People in England just talk like that" and "Two people can be just friends without hidden romantic feelings!" They were right on both accounts of course, many would concede, but that doesn't mean these two in particular weren't together!

The final, and most sane, side didn't really have a name for themselves but could be considered neutral. They firmly believed that a) it was none of their business and b) if something was happening between those two it was a private matter. They generally tried to reign in the other two groups when they went too far in their meddling or arguments, but mostly they just decided "what happens happens."

It wasn't until roughly half a year later, on July 31, that people finally got their answer on what was going on between those two.

Severus had never been one for displaying his emotions publicly, not even to his viewers. The only time he could be considered personally emotional was when he was passionately talking about an amazing new author he found or his favorite chemicals and compounds. 

But this stream was different. It was titled "For Gilderoy" and the entire stream was just Severus, for one, showing a large amount of emotion. He bared his heart with raw emotion and was making jokes and references to… Dates!?!?

"I remember the first time you asked me to dinner, and I didn't believe you were serious, at all. I had though you were just pulling a joke on me, like many others had before. So that night when you took me out to this obscenely fancy restaurant, you were dressed to the nines and I looked like I had just been hit by a bus." Here Severus interrupted himself to laugh fondly " You kept saying for weeks after that it was the best diner you ever had there." He smiled at the camera.

"Gilderoy, I love you. It wasn't love at first sight like how fairytales describe it, and I didn't just fall in either. I was afraid when we started dating that all of this was a joke and you would leave at any moment, but time and time again you stayed. Even when I pissed you off with my cold behavior and sharp comments. Or there were better looking men looking your way. I eventually chose to try and love you like you loved me. I walked into our relationship knowing what I was doing and for the first time in years hoping it would work out. And it wasn't easy given my past, but it worked and we just, fit so well together. We fought a lot at first and would constantly break and rebuild our relationship, working on it again and again. We are still working on our relationship, and I want to continue to do that for the rest of our lives." At this point he was actually crying, just a few happy tears but this was more than anyone had ever seen from him. For once the chat was dead.

"Gilderoy, will you marry me?"

There was a pause lasting for only a few minutes before someone else, who had left the chat moments before after realizing where this was going, had come back and finally revived the chat. 

AbwpDumble_Bee: Coming from Gilderoy's stream, he just asked you the same question.

As soon as Severus had read that comment he was off like a light to Gilderoy's recording room, just two over from his. Views quickly changed streams to see what would happen next.

On Gilderoy's stream, he was freely crying waiting for a response from Severus' account, when the man of the hour busted in and knelt down in front of him.

"Do you mean it? You- You-" the every eloquent Severus was at a loss and eventually just gave up trying to speak and looked up at his boyfriend.

"Of course I do!" And before Gilderoy could get another word across Severus was already kissing him, and the stream suddenly stopped.

But it didn't matter, the light side had won, and less than a year later Gilderoy Lockhart became Gilderoy Lockhart-Snape. In honor of how they had proposed to each other, later revealed to have been an unplanned coincidence, they streamed the entire event, posting an edited version to both their channels. 


End file.
